Woken up by happy happy news, that made even the upcoming exams seem a little more manageable. :D
Ten days. All the planning is making me realise new things, or rather things I knew. Just that I didn’t know the extent of it.
I like that you make me feel like everything is a possibility.
That I am braver and stronger than I think I am; brave enough to take yet another risk, strong enough to face all obstacles on my own.
I am super thankful,
For Char & Michelle for accompanying me for hours last night.
For Christine who’s been worried, and dropped by to visit with cupcakes today.
And for the parents, for constantly checking in. (:
Yesterday, submitting the thesis was the happiest moment of the entire academic year.
I crashed for almost 20 hours, thinking that when I woke up, I’d be really happy and relieved and just, stress-free.
Today, I woke up. And I didn’t feel all that happy. Relieved yes, but it wasn’t all those positive feelings I’d expected.
Somehow, somewhere in me, there’s a sinking feeling, a really depressive feeling.
It’s sinking in, reality is finally sinking in.
And it’s so depressing that I just want to sit in the dark and stare at nothing. For a moment, just for a moment, it felt as though I’d never feel happy again.
What’s wrong now.
It feels like a never-ending cycle.
And I’m starting to burn out, my brain is starting to malfunction, my fingers are starting to misspell words.
Another sleepless night, with Tablo and Epik High on loop.
Summary. Abstract. Discussion. Introduction.
Ten thousand.
It’s NOT about whether or not I mind sharing my stuff. I really don’t.
It’s about asking for permission.
I don’t like the idea of people using my stuff, without me knowing at all. Especially since I’m always away for long periods.
It’s not even that hard to just send a text to inform me. It’s not as if I’ll say no.
Just because you do certain things a certain way doesn’t mean that’s how I do things too.
But whatever, I’m always going to end up looking like the bad guy anyway.
(Source: leilockheart)
